First- don't panic. We love you. This is your safe haven.
Second, make sure you're an actual idiot:
http://www.pagetutor.com/idiot/idiot.html
Good.
Now, get this book:
Ok- we have that out of the way, we can move on to more complicated things.
...
HEY! Pay attention! Your new trick is fascinating, but it won't help you on FN.
It's important to know that you can be an idiot and still have an important role in the world.
This idiot is part of an important protest. Don't sell yourself short- if you put your mind to it you can do anything. In fact, some experts will tell you that idiots are making real progress in securing their stature among the elite.
Skeptical? I don't blame you. But I have proof that idiots can make it big.
Some have even used their idiocy as a means to its own end.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Being an idiot, that probably sailed right over your head, but don't worry. The point is, there are many of us here who will exploit...uh, help you figure it all out.
Just send $10 to Porkins, care of FN. I'll handle the rest.
Melissa Haro
Meghan White
Did You See That?
NFL's Quadruple Threats
Comments (4) Add A Comment
Great blog Porkins....but wouldn't true idiots have a hard time reading this? Do you have a version on tape so the real idiots can listen instead of having to learn how to read first?
rstowe
Newport News , VA
Total Comments (21440)
We hire goons to go to their houses and act out the plot.
Porkins
The Triangle, NC
Total Comments (9912)
We need to exorcise the demon idiots and save the idiot's soul!
Ghost.
Miami, FL
Total Comments (14560)
I can help you with that, Ghost.
Tracy00214-Is back!
Total Comments (32851)
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