In light of the Eagles lifting their skirts up again versus the Bears this week, I have to put something funny up or I'll go mental....whoops. Too late. LOL Enjoy and feel free to post comments below. Most of these are a *cough* Ripoff *cough* of Austin Powers. Brownie points for which one in the threequel or which other movie I got these from.
Weasel Legal Disclaimer in Fine Print...(no real points awarded once again)
Momma McNabb: Donovan, deh ever catch dat gorilla that busted outa da zoo and punched you in da eye?
Donovan McNabb: No Momma, the search continues.
[as Testaverde, who is 43 years old, approaches]
John Fox: Jeff, did you hire an Assistant Coach without telling me?
Jeff Davidson: No, I found a Quarterback without telling you.
John Fox: Well, I hope he gets younger as he gets closer.
Pac Man Jones: I've been tryin' to go legit.
Roger Goodell: Of course...
Pac Man Jones: But when you're an undersized child, in a society that demands perfection, your sense of right and wrong, fair and unfair will always be tragically skewed...
[farts]
Roger Goodell: Did you just soil yourself?
Pac Man Jones: Maybe.
Bill Belichick: [Rapping to the tune of "Hard Knock Life"]
I don't know how to be no crib on MTV, God only knows, got my Tom Brady and the GP see how it goes. Evil's all that I see, you ask me my name? M to the rizzo, B to the elichizzo, I to the cizzo. I'm a crazy mo-fo, y'all knew that. Eric caught me in the first week, it's all backwards, what's up with that? So I'll make a prophecy from the dogs to the Tom Brady. Gimme an Escalade, two way, bling-bling on eBay. TOUCHDOWN, mo-fo!
(Moronic TD from last week's blog 500 comments later)
Newbie TDer: That was not three arguments just now.Idiot TDer: I told you I'm not allowed to argue with you unless you've challenged.
Newbie TDer: I just challenged.
Idiot TDer: No you haven't.
Newbie TDer: Yes I have.
Idiot TDer: No you haven't.
Newbie TDer: Look, I don't want to argue about this.
Idiot TDer: Well you didn't pay.
Newbie TDer: Aha! If I didn't pay, why are you arguing? See, I've got you.
Idiot TDer: Not necessarily. I could be arguing in my spare time.
Newbie TDer: I've had enough of this.
Idiot TDer: No you haven't.
Ozzy Osbourne: boo.b.s!
Sharon Osbourne: boo.b.s., Ozzy?
Ozzy Osbourne: These bloggers are just a bunch of effing boo.b.s..
Kelly Osbourne: What do you mean, Dad?
Ozzy Osbourne: I mean, they're using the same effing jokes as they did in the last Blog.
Sharon Osbourne: What effing joke?
Jack Osbourne: You know, the effing joke about the rocket that looks like some guy's...
Marv Lewis: Johnson!
Tom Brady: Gisele, if I ever lost you I don't know what I would do.
[pauses] I'd probably move on, get another super model girlfriend but there would be a 15 minute period there where I would just be inconsolable.
Tom Brady: Easy peasy, (Cleo) lemon-squeasy. What, is this your first day on the job or something? Look, this is how it goes; You try to sack me, one at a time, and I knock you both out with a single pass. Ready? Go!
[Dolfins defense does exactly as he predicted]
Tom Brady: Judo pass. Judo pass.
Bill Belichick: Oh, he's good.
Dolphins Linebacker: [approaches warily]
Tom Brady: Do you know who I am?
Dolphins Linebacker: [nods]
Tom Brady: Have you got any idea how many anonymous Linebackers I've juked over the years?
Dolphins Linebacker: [nods again]
Tom Brady: I mean, look at you. You don't even have a name tag. You've got no chance. Why don't you just fall down?
[Linebacker falls down]
Eric Mangini: [both are on the Jerry Springer show] How could you do this to me? On national television!
Dr. Belichick: Well throw me a freakin' bone here, Man-genius.
Eric Mangini: Why did you cheat on me?
Dr. Belichick: Because you're not quite evil enough.
[audience boos]
Dr. Belichick: Well it's true! It's true! You're semi-evil. You're quasi-evil. You're the margarine of evil. You're the Diet Coke of evil. Just one calorie, not evil enough.
Apologies if this was a bit Patriot-heavy, but props to a team that's steam-rolling the league and looking pretty good while doing it.
Hope you enjoyed it. Hope your week doesn't stink as bad as the Eagle's offense does. LOL
Christina Parker
Brooklyn Decker
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Comments (11) Add A Comment
Ha Ha HA
and yes Goldmember was on TBS today so I get the references
You want to play a…
Princeton , LA
Total Comments (29442)
haha this was entertaining.
pecotafreak
Lusby, MD
Total Comments (1134)
Hence my inspiration for this one. Gotta love Austin Powers.
Oso Famoso
Palinville, AK
Total Comments (18064)
AWESOME !!!!! LOL !!!!!!!!!!!
Ed Reed Fan:4 TD'S…
Total Comments (1473)
You should get some Spaceballs in here.
Big Ben68
Total Comments (20933)
Good stuff Oso ! I never realized Momma Mcnabb sounds just like Kathy Bates as Mama Boucher in the Waterboy.
Harry Callahan
Total Comments (8390)
All I can say about this is Fv<K the Patriots!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cassidy's Pumpkins 4…
Whatsittoya, NO
Total Comments (14070)
Good blog.
Dyhard:Homecoming…
Germantown, WI
Total Comments (32498)
Lol.
ravensfan* won't be…
D Cab For Pres!, MD
Total Comments (1804)
So THAT's what it was...now you know that.
Nobody gets "Spaceballs", and I saw it in a theater!!!
Cass, the Pats GET f-ed this Sunday...do you not pay attention to me??
(Did I say "nice picture" before??? I'm SURE that I did...)
DC Sports Nut: 97…
Total Comments (2416)
I could do some quotes with Spaceballs. May the Schwartz be with you. LOL
Oso Famoso
Palinville, AK
Total Comments (18064)
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