Super-agent Scott Boras has informed the Yankees that third baseman Alex Rodriguez has opted out of the last three years (and $92 million) of his deal and is now a free agent. Here are the top 10 contract demands that A-Rod and Boras are making to potential suitors:
10. First $200 million paid in singles
9. Manager not allowed to look me in the eye
8. City's residents must make "A-Rod tithe"
7. Two words: Oprah money
6. Fans who boo home team's players must have tongue removed
5. I just want to fit in, and by "fit in" I mean make more than the rest of the guys combined
4. Team must not have winning tradition that anyone could blame me for ruining
3. Tabloid headlines playing off my nickname officially ruled "A-Cliché"
2. Unlimited obscene T-shirts for the missus
1. Home field must be renamed "Jeter Sucks Stadium"
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Must be allowed to take Octobers off...nevermind...he will whether this is in the contract or not.
rstowe
Newport News , VA
Total Comments (24667)
Be allowed to not bat with runners in scoring position or after the 7th inning so no one can ever call him "Not a good hitter in the clutch".
rstowe
Newport News , VA
Total Comments (24667)
The game must stop if the ball is ever hit to him so he can take his time and make sure not to commit an error.
rstowe
Newport News , VA
Total Comments (24667)
Even though I turned down 30 mil a year to play for the most storied franchise in baseball, everyone will acknowledge that me becoming a free agent "isn't about the money".
rstowe
Newport News , VA
Total Comments (24667)
6. Should be: Fans who Boo me must be shot on sight
11. If Yankees ever visit, "Jeter Sucks" must be continiously played through stadium soundsystem for duration of the game.
FootballGuru
Total Comments (822)
11) Free burritos daily to remind him of his heritage. All burritos must be wrapped in gold skrim.
rock_chalk
Total Comments (10529)
Willing to play any position for the right money - as long as the change in position is noted whenever an error is made.
Paula
Pinckney , MI
Total Comments (133)
12. A "that's OK buddy--maybe next year" clause written in to his contract for all post-season games
rock_chalk
Total Comments (10529)
Can never be batted lower than 4th...no matter how bad of an Ofer streak I'm on.
rstowe
Newport News , VA
Total Comments (24667)
Must bat 3rd or 4th or pouting will ensue with additional loss in production.
Paula
Pinckney , MI
Total Comments (133)
Blonde, ummm, PR reps provided for all away games
MungoDM
Total Comments (3299)
13. Full membership to any local strip clubs.
rock_chalk
Total Comments (10529)
First refusal on trades or drafting of teammates, coaches & managers - because I'm all about the team and locker room chemistry.
Paula
Pinckney , MI
Total Comments (133)
Small print at the bottom: Will perform in the clutch or in the post season only if the total value of the contract is doubled for each such occurrence.
BoFett
Total Comments (4243)
Custom made t-shirts at wife's request.
Anthony Verna
New York , NY
Total Comments (5899)
Not just dirty ones.
Anthony Verna
New York , NY
Total Comments (5899)
Strip clubs have memberships?
Do they have membership drives? Do you have to pay a yearly fee plus the cover and any tips?
Kari - DaPrez
Geneva , IL
Total Comments (7836)
If they do, I'm betting they are used more than those health club memberships that you sign up for and never step foot in the club again.
And I'm confused - so is he ****, a dog, or just acts like a dog to cover being ****?
Paula
Pinckney , MI
Total Comments (133)
Okay - g-a-y. Jeez, what if I was just talking about his mood????
Paula
Pinckney , MI
Total Comments (133)
all women/strippers must resemble Zena .
jobathehutt
Lebanon , PA
Total Comments (8)
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