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Roy Williams and No. 1 UNC face Michigan State tonight.

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All times Eastern.

• 8:00 p.m., NBA TV: The Hornets meet the Suns, looking for their fifth victory in six games -- and sixth straight in the series.

• 9:00 p.m., Showtime: Inside the NFL continues its rookie season on Showtime.

• 9:15 p.m., ESPN: Top-ranked North Carolina meets No. 13 Michigan State in the marquee matchup of the ACC-Big Ten Challenge. The Tar Heels can only hope it's not their lone trip of the season to Ford Field -- site of this year's Final Four.

• 10:00 p.m., Versus: The fourth season of The Contender, the Mark Burnett-created boxing reality show, premieres tonight. Tony Danza is amped up about it.

• 11:00 p.m., FOX: In a classic Seinfeld ep ("The Big Salad"), Kramer fears a golf dispute pushed his opponent to murder.

The Metrodome: the scene of a very public crime on Nov. 22.

AP

Humorist Garrison Keillor wrote up this light-hearted take on the coitus interruptus at the Metrodome during the Iowa-Minnesota game on Nov. 22. (FTR posted this item on the incident last week.)

The Iowans apparently did not know each other until they got really, really drunk and ran into each other on the concourse. Probably their shared Iowaness in enemy territory was an initial bond -- Minnesotans tell the same jokes about Iowans that used to be told about Polish people -- and they were a little happy about the fact that the Hawkeyes were walloping the Gophers (55-0 was the final score), and somehow the 38-year-old woman and the 26-year-old guy wound up in a handicapped stall in a men's room and had intercourse, which drew a crowd who cheered them on.

They were interrupted by a security man who spotted two pairs of feet under the partition and saw underwear on the floor and called police, who arrested them for indecent conduct, a misdemeanor, and released the male perp to the custody of his girlfriend and the woman to her husband. That is mostly all we know, except that the woman has told reporters, "It's ruined my life," which is pretty much what a nice Midwestern lady should say after she's gotten drunk and had sex in public with a complete stranger. It shows good manners. You can't have drunken public sex with a stranger and say, "I don't know what got into me!" You are supposed to sit in the ashes and rock back and forth for a while.

Midwesterners have always needed to go elsewhere to misbehave and so when people head south to Florida or Arizona in January, purportedly for the warm weather, we know better. "Warm weather for what?" we ask. Public sex, most likely.

Good stuff from the Prairie Home Companion creator.

What were you thinking? [Salon]
At stadiums nationwide, bathroom intimacy trending up [For The Record]

Terrell Owens has left legions of aggravated fans in his wake.

Getty Images

Nothing lights a sports fan's fire quite like a classic villain. "Sloppy" Sean Avery of the Dallas Stars has played the role to perfection in recent years, demonstrating a knack for getting under the skins of opponents, teammates and fans alike. But the aspiring fashionista (and accomplished pest) needs to put in a couple more years before joining our list of the five athletes sports fans most love to hate...

1. Barry Bonds: Defiant to the last regarding his alleged steroid use, Bonds has alienated teammates, fans, reporters and just about everybody he's come into contact with over the past decade. Rick Reilly's memorable 2001 column sums the home run champ up: "There are 24 teammates who hang out with one another, play cards and bond, and there's Bonds, sequestered in the far corner of the clubhouse with his p.r. man, masseur, flex guy, weight trainer, three lockers, a reclining massage chair and a big-screen television that only he can see."

2. Terrell Owens: Opposing fans despise his irrepressible showboating and, frankly, his undeniable production. But supporters of T.O.'s former teams in San Francisco and Philadelphia grew weary of his chronic narcissism and cannibalistic tendencies to cut down his quarterbacks. It's never Terrell's fault.

3. Ron Artest: One of the NBA's premier defenders is best known for a much more dubious distinction: his leading role in the 2004 fight on the court (and in the stands) between the Pacers and Pistons at the Palace. Artest was suspended 86 games for his instigating role and his image has never quite recovered. But the Queens native wasn't exactly a model teammate beforehand. He applied for part-time summer job at a Circuit City during his rookie season with the Bulls (to reap the employee electronics discount), served a number of pre-brawl suspensions for flagrant fouls (and once smashing a camera at Madison Square Garden), and earned a two-game benching in November 2004 after asking for time off to promote an album during the regular season. Our favorite? During his first All-Star Game appearance in '04, Artest switched and mismatched his sneakers throughout the game in hopes of landing a shoe deal.

Fox is expected to air the BCS championship game in 3-D.

File Photo

USA Today reports Fox Sports will announce plans today to air the BCS championship game in 3-D at certain theaters.

While Fox is the first to lead the public in on its experiment, it isn't alone in seeing 3-D as having a future in sports. The NBA, before invited guests such as advertisers, has carried an All-Star Game in 3-D. Thursday, the NFL Network's Oakland Raiders-San Diego Chargers game will be shown to invited viewers in theaters in Boston, Los Angeles and New York.

Even if Fox's 3-D BCS action looks good — remember, this network created the NHL's "glowing puck" in the 1990s — you wonder if many fans will want to wear goofy 3-D glasses. Not to worry, Hill says: "Tommy Hilfiger will make 3-D glasses, and there'll be special 'date' glasses."

Commemorative 3-D glasses? Sold!

What do you think about this trend? Would you ever consider going to a theater to watch your team in 3-D? What sporting events do you think would work best with this technology?

BCS on Fox going 3-D in theaters [USA Today]

Chris Chelios: still punching the clock at the ripe age of 46.

David E. Klutho/SI

Each day during the noon hour, we'll offer five reading recommendations from around the Web.

1. America's Oldest Pro Athletes (By Andrew Farrell, Forbes.com): Chris Chelios, Jamie Moyer and John Carney rank among the most notable quadragenarians in sports.

2. How Phelps Became the Face of PureSport (By Matthew Futterman, The Wall Street Journal): The Sportsman of the Year's appearance as pitchman for a Texas protein-powder maker might go down in the annals of sports marketing as one of the most unusual deals ever.

3. No move is Weis move for Notre Dame (By Lenn Robbins, New York Post): Why the South Bend school would be foolish to fire Charlie Weis.