Cain-Willis. In & Out... won the Throwdown.
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Fountain of Youth, Ca
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Zito vs Marlins


Edge Marlins

All homer vote aside, I'll take the Marlins on this one for two reasons...

1) Marlins hitting

First, they have just swept the D'backs, and though it was not a blowout for the Marlins hitters if we consider the pitchers they faced, it was impressive nonetheless.

1st game: Owings (5-2 with a 3.81 ERA)
2nd : Webb (9-1 with a 2.69 ERA)
3rd: Haren (5-3 with a 3.39 ERA)

*note - pitchers' records include Marlins loss.

Much tougher pitchers and they got the hits and runs necessary to win each game...but this series aside:

Marlins are (MLB):
11th in Runs
2nd in HRs
2nd in SLG

Not to mention Uggla's red hot bat (.315, 14 HRs, 32 RBIs)


2) Zito's poor play

0-8 record
6.25 ERA
Just 22 SOs
Allowing 4 or more runs in 6 of 9 games
.351 Bat avg against on the road...
And 14 of the 28 batters he faced reached base safely in his last outing.

Zito's recovering will not be in this game...though he may not stink it up as he has done so this year, the Marlins bats are hot and will be enough to give him yet another loss.


Ahhh.....my friend, you failed to adress the fact that there ARE marlins quite capable of being taken down by the multi-sport athlete named Barry Zito. Sure, probably not the baseball players called 'Marlins', although Zito did go 2-0 against the Marlins in his epic failure of a year last year, and 1-hit them in 7 innings striking out 8 in his MOST DOMINATING start of the 2007 campaign.


The Marlins Zito will take down are the ones in the sea, known among more educated circles as 'Makaira nigricans'. Did you know that there are fishing charter boats who guarantee success? You can charter for a 1/2 day, 3/4 day, or whole day. Zito, with mere pocket change (he had an entire off day yesterday in Florida) can book one of Florida's most all-inclusive trips, with 'courteous, experienced and qualified crew'! It's a slam dunk! With fishing success rate of 100%, and zito experience with the sea, ZITO WILL TAKE DOWN THE MARLINS!


Man vs fish has been going on for hundreds of years.. Zito has the best of staff, most modern boats, as well as wise and sea-tested guides. There's no way he can fail.



Zito vs Marlins? I say they take the bait.

Zito - 1
Marlins - 0


Well there you go....I have nothing to say.

Just one thing: If Zito is as cross-eyed in fishing as he is in pitching, then the marlins are on easy street.


Ahh.....let's not try and make Zito out to be some ugly, cross-eyed village idiot, he's actually a somewhat handsome man. I certainly hope you won't bring up Jim Abbott in your next argument....:-)

Fishing for Marlins is actually quite an art. You need about 500 yards of 80lb test line, and MUST be sure your drag is properly set. Some of the more popular lures have such color combinations as green/black, blue/pink, purple/black, etc, with soft-baits gaining in popularity. (Live bait fishing is also possible, but you would need to check your bait often to see if it got off)

The female marlins get bigger than the males, and Zito certainly seems to have females drawn to him despite his currently less-than-stellar pitching performances. I have no doubt that ZIto will be successful against the marlins, after all, he is a cerebral type, often caught up in strategy and the mental aspects of sports.

I have no doubt that Zito is well prepared and will give everything he's got in the struggle for supremecy....


He might hook the fish, but in the end the marlin will stab his eye out and he'll drop the line freeing the marlin, resulting in a huge celebration by all marlins in the sea as they start poking holes in the boat making it sink. At which time the marlins will surely eat Zito ultimately giving the win for both the Marlins and the marlins.


Let look at the big picture:

1) The TD topic says 'Zito vs Marlins' I have given substancial evidance that Zito is guarenteed success when going against marlins, and he IS a man of preparation.

2) Zito has been turning his season slowly around if you care enough about looking past the 0-8 record. The Giants have scored 5 runs in his last 3 starts, hardly enough to get him a win. In fact, in his last 3 starts, ZIto gave up 2, 3, and 2 runs, in 5, 6, and 5 innings. The Marlins team has scored fewer runs than the Astros and only 6 more than the Sox, and has struck out more than any other team in MLB!!!! It's likely Zito will go 5-6 innings tonight and give up 1-3 runs.(The Giants have more hits, doubles, triples, steals, walks, and fewer strikeouts than Florida.)

Florida's starter faced KC last, and gave up 7 hits, 5 walks. His velocity is down, and that is concerning people higher up.

Zito's career ERA is nearly a run lower than Olsen's.

I realize that's it's 'cool' and 'hip' to dislike Zito, but the plain and simple facts are, in the Zito vs Marlins showdown, the odds are in Zito's favor.

Epic fail.

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I think this might get ugly...

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Cue Cain/Wilis running away and hiding behind his mothers skirt...

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Zito couldn't be the ace of my barbeque.

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Cain suggested the topic, for anyone thinking I'm picking on him and going for the easy win....

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This is like picking between "Jaws 3" and "Glitter". They both suck.

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Yankees suck even more.

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That's balderdash!

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Cue Cain/Wilis running away and hiding behind his mothers skirt...
The Ram is Jimmy Lee | 05/23/08, 12:57 PM

I was going to but i picked up the hem and holy crap, you beat me there.

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I was going to but i picked up the hem and holy crap, you beat me there.

Cain-Willis. Hunting Hunters | 05/23/08, 01:17 PM

Nah. That must have been someone else. I think I'm the only person who hasn't been up your mothers skirt.

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Nah. That must have been someone else. I think I'm the only person who hasn't been up your mothers skirt.
The Ram is Jimmy Lee

No......I just found my watch up her skirt. Well, I think its my watch

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Well, considering i'm an orphan you guys must have done some digging...

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Well, considering i'm an orphan you guys must have done some digging...

Cain-Willis. Hunting Hunters | 05/23/08, 01:35 PM

The Orphanage told you your parents died? That's nice of them. That's better for a child's psyche than hearing they weren't wanted due to excessive ugliness.

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Marlins is a specific name, which signifies :TEAM ...the animal doesnt have a proper name, therefore it would be marlins with a lower case m....

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Zito's last 3 starts have been quality starts. 5 innings 2 runs, 6 innings 3 runs, 5 innings 2 runs. Olson on the other hand has faced weaker teams his last 2 starts and given up 4 runs in 6 innings, and 3 runs in 6 innings.

So Zito has been pitching BETTER against BETTER teams than Olsen.

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Marlins is a specific name, which signifies :TEAM ...the animal doesnt have a proper name, therefore it would be marlins with a lower case m....
Ghost is...hunting ducks! | 05/23/08, 02:16 PM

If you meant ONLY the Florida Marlins you should have wrote Florida Marlins. Since you did not specify what Marlins, I merely argued Zito vs Marlins.

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I must say though Ghost, your last two arguments really gave me a lot to think about....

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Imagine a whole bunch of those pointy marlins going after you?!

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They would kill Zito

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My arguments are better.

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